What I want to do right now.

A week of withdrawal

The 18-hour flight going back to the Philippines was a torture due to the fact that I was being carried away from the country I called home for 3 months and a week.  During the two flights, I secretly cried in my seat, hiding it from my fellow passengers. It was such an overwhelming feeling. I was crying when I was saying my goodbyes to my mum and Dave. I couldn't help it. Even inside the holding area, while talking to my mum on the mobile, I was crying really hard. I really didn't care if people stared at me. 

I even cried when I saw the Makati skyline not because I missed it, it is because I was wishing that I was back in the UK, not here.

The first week back was the hardest. I cried during the first 3 days of being here in the house. I was so unhappy. To top up my unhappiness, I started reminiscing everything that has happened to me for the past 3 months and a week. I wanted to get out of the house. Thank god, one of my bff invited me to accompany her to her work and an instant sleepover happened. But the loneliness  

Slowly, I was letting Philippines, my home, in again. It was so hard to say goodbye to the hospitality of every Filipino and English I met there that I seriously wanted to live right there and there. Well, because my mum was there too. And this person I met.

Happy to tell you that I have not been crying. Deep in my heart, I know that my trip that lasted for 3 months and a week is the not last trip I am ever going to make. I will definitely be back. <3 

 I found out something about myself. I fall easily. 

The End is Near

In two days time, I'll be flying back to the Philippines. It's a bittersweet ending when I was just really opening my arms and letting England in. 

In the first few weeks of November, I was pretty much stuck inside of the house because my mom had hours of work. I thought for a moment there, my trip just ended. But nearing the last weeks of November, my mom's friend, Tita Gina, started inviting me to their night outs. I really didn't care if I was hanging out with probably menopausal Filipino women. I was glad I was out of the house. 

But really, I couldn't thank enough my mom, Estela and Dave for giving me this opportunity to visit this beautiful country, cold but beautiful. You took a chance on me! hahaha I love you both! 

The Goffs and Fishers, I am so glad to meet you all in person, not through Yahoo chat or picture messages sent by  mom.

Brighton Photo Fringe, for giving me the opportunity to be one of your volunteers. It opened my eyes to the possibilities of me, becoming an art photographer. So much inspiration to take home with me. 

Paula ( My Spanish little sister! )and your mom, coffee after mass! I'll miss it even though we sometimes got lost in translation. 

The Filipinas (Tita Lorna, Tita Angie, Tita Dory, Ate Carol, Ate Chari) here in Eastbourne. You crazy women!! Hope to see you again soon!

Tita Gina, Naman!! Thank you really. Inom pa! 

Mister Beer, you hardworking man! I will never forget you. You made me feel so special just by looking at me even from across the room. Those bottle green eyes. haaaay 

I've been secretly crying and the weather doesn't help at all.  I just don't want leave yet. But yes, the end is near and I can see how it will end. In tears.  

DeVotchka - How It Ends 

A Trip

“A trip, a safari, an exploration, is an entity, different from all other journeys.  It has personality, temperament, individuality, uniqueness.  A journey is a person in itself; no two are alike” - Travels with Charley 

Tidings

These past few days were kind of a blur to me.  Some things that were unexpected to happen or should I say, waiting to happen, happened. It was slowly sinking in until last Thursday, news came to me that my highschool ka-barkada is going to be a mother. 

And I was ecstatic! We knew all these years that she was going to be the first to be a mom. My whole barkada was so happy that some of us were actually crying, including me. It was overwhelming. You see, we haven't really seen each other for a long time. Like almost a year or two. We were never complete when we had gatherings and coordinating with them was a big pain in the ass (But thank you Elaine!).  So hearing this good news was really a blessing. It's the first baby of the barkada and I just know the baby will spoiled by us, the whole seven of us titas. 

To Mads and Carlo, Congratulations!! I could not be any happier for the two of you! 

Ten years bago naging totoo ang hula :D 

To Baby Tols, can't wait to meet you! 

To the rest of my barkada, I'll see you on December!! Let us brave the traffic of Zapote Road and visit our party house back in high school, more importantly, visit Mads and have blastin' Christmas! 

I  miss and love you all!! <3 

Us, some ten++ years ago 

This needs updating^^

The power of smile

:) Just smile at me.