Finality

Something has changed. It's like the spell that was casted upon me was finally broken. Maybe it was Maningning Miclat's poem and Warsan Shire's poem that helped me to actually see. Or time broke the spell. Or it was both. Or the realization that I am Vitzka! Stop doing these things to yourself! 

Thank you, you two,for being a cruel part of my life. 

:)

On new places and taking a ton of photos

I just realized that taking photos is not so important when you're in a new place/country. You are so busy taking photos of buildings, objects, telephone booths, train stations, bus stops, stores, etc., that you forget to immerse yourself in that certain moment. 

I was going through my England/Scotland photos a while ago.  Some of it instantly brought me back to that place but others were so vague to that point that I was almost into tears. I couldn't remember what happened during that day or that hour. As a sentimental person, I wanted to punch myself for letting this happen. 

It's just pointless to take a hundred or a thousand photos and forgetting where you are, who you with, the color of the sky, the weather, the time. Those things are really the important ones you should remember. 

Photographs are just mere aides. Never again 

 I found out something about myself. I fall easily. 

Realization

I went to visit the Brighton Photo Fringe 2 weeks ago. I volunteered to invigilate for some days in November and decided to check the venue as well as the exhibitions so I will get the feeling of it. 

As a struggling photographer, I was dumbfounded with the exhibitions I saw. I felt my works were immature and nonsensical. After reviewing my portfolio, gosh, it was awful. I had some catching up to do BIG TIME. Where the hell I have been all this time? I need depth, passion and determination. 

I want to tell you a story. I want to tell one so bad! 

P.S. 

Mr. Sun. please shine on Eastbourne. Pretty Please?